After you have fixed your goal, tackle the second stage. At this stage, you associate intolerable disadvantages with your old behavior (which you want to change) and incredible advantages with your new behavior. Specifically, this goes like this: Think about what exactly you want to do (your fixed goal). Imagine what will happen if you don’t address it – the downsides that would result.
Imagine the worst, how terrible it could become if you don’t change your behavior. Give this image tremendous weight. Make it bulky and big, so that in doing so you build up an inner pressure within yourself to avoid all of this. The more horrible you make this image, the more motivated you will be in your actions to avert the negative.
Change perspective
Now that you have imagined this, change your perspective. Now imagine what it will be like to adopt your new, desired behavior. Imagine the most incredible benefits you can imagine. Possibly it will help you to be more successful, to consolidate your personality! Possibly you will receive recognition, advance to a recognized specialist in your field or simply become more satisfied in the certainty that you have done something right, something good. Does this goal fascinate you enough?
The difficulty with behavior change is that we very often talk about what we could and should change, but don’t see it as an absolute must. Many people will only change things immediately if they feel compelled to change.
Behavior change has to be intentional
The question is not whether you can change, but whether they really want to change. This is a question of motivation, and this in turn is determined by pain or pleasure. Behavioral changes are often only really brought about when the “pain threshold” is reached. Unfortunately, there are enough people who have to be in this total state of pain before they will change anything.
I recommend you not to wait so long, but to collect reasons for change. Reasons for pros and cons. Note: It is not a question of the effort your change will necessarily entail, it is a question of the price you will have to pay if you do not change.
