Diagnosis

The diagnosis of an excessive fear of loss, in psychology called “Emotional disorder with separation anxiety of childhood“, is made on the basis of certain observable behavioral patterns and fears expressed by the child. These include, for example, refusal to go to school or kindergarten in order to stay with the caregiver or persistent but unrealistic fears of dangers that could separate the child from the caregiver. These fears can also affect the child as physical symptoms, including headaches, nausea and vomiting or abdominal pain.

While most of these behaviors occur in most children as they develop, the diagnosis of such an emotional disorder is primarily concerned with the extent and duration of these behaviors. In general, it is not possible to give a precise circumstance or behavior when fears of loss are still “normal” in children and when they are considered “abnormal”, as these depend on many factors, such as the child’s character or environment. In most cases, however, a comparison with children of the same age and an exchange with other parents about their children’s behavior can help to better assess one’s own child.

It is completely normal and also provided for by nature that babies and toddlers start to cry when their parents leave or even lose sight of them, because they have not yet learned that parents always come back. This realization only develops over time, so that children of one year old do not always start to cry as soon as the caregiver (mother or father) is not visible. The term “conspicuous” would describe a behavior in which this process occurs much later and children at the age of two or three years still show a pronounced anxiety as soon as the caregiver moves away for a few minutes. Another test for most children is the beginning of their kindergarten years, as this is usually the first time they are separated from their parents for a long time. Normally, however, the children get used to the fact that they have to spend a few hours without their parents within one or two weeks.If this process lasts much longer or if the fears that arise even make it impossible to attend kindergarten, this can also be described as “conspicuous”, whereupon one should specifically address the child’s fears and find measures to cope with them.