With puberty, not only the beard begins to grow in boys: even more important than the physical is the mental change that eventually leads to the weaning from the parental home. “Questions such as ‘who am I?’ and ‘what do I want in life?’ come more and more to the fore,” says Josef Zimmermann, a qualified psychologist and head of the Catholic Education and Family Counseling Center in Cologne. He advises: “On the one hand, parents should stand up for their points of view and continue to set limits. On the other hand, they should take an interest in the children’s living environment and keep a place in it by offering opportunities for togetherness. With boys, fathers are then particularly in demand.”
Puberty = time of crisis?
For girls in Germany, puberty begins when they are a little older than ten, and for boys at about age twelve. It lasts between three and five years. Often, puberty is wrongly referred to as a crisis period, Zimmermann criticizes. This ignores the fact that the period between childhood and adulthood brings many new and positive developments. Boys become men who seek their own paths and take responsibility for their actions.
“Puberty is difficult because the previous world of children collapses without the adolescents having already arrived in the new adult world,” explains the certified psychologist.
Physical changes
Accordingly, this phase is associated with insecurity for many teenagers. This is intensified by the hormonally triggered physical changes: In addition to enormous growth spurts, the external and internal sexual characteristics also develop.
In addition, boys’ voices begin to change. While girls have their first menstruation during puberty, boys ejaculate for the first time. Both sexes begin to take an interest in sexuality. Their sebaceous glands produce a lot of fat, which causes pimples to blossom and further cloud their self-confidence.
Not visible, but of equal importance, are hormonally induced changes in the brains of adolescents. “These enable boys and girls to think abstractly,” explains Zimmermann. As a result, young people think more about life and what they want from it.
“For the first time, young people are asking questions about the meaning of life,” the psychologist knows. In their search for answers, teenagers become aware of their identity and their idiosyncrasies. At the same time, they critically question the behavior of their parents and their environment – which often results in conflicts. These are intensified by mood swings triggered by the hormonal changes. As a result, pubescent boys often react sensitively to their environment. “They either behave irritably-aggressively or they tend to withdraw,” Zimmermann says.
