What does education without punishment look like?

An upbringing without punishment can be such that the parents take the children out of a situation and come to rest together. One calms down and talks together about the child’s misbehaviour and tries to explain to the child what it has done wrong and why it is important that the child does not make this mistake again in the future. In addition, it is important to give the child the opportunity to learn from its mistakes.

Every now and then you can give the child a second chance to learn from its behaviour. If you have the impulse to punish the child for its misconduct, you can pause for a moment. If one has the feeling that one has behaved abusively, one can also apologize to the child and dissolve the punishment.

An essential aspect of an upbringing without punishment is a joint discussion on the subject. Parents and child sit together and discuss the child’s actions. They look for a solution together and decide together.

Sometimes it can be a good opportunity to do joint activities to relax and decelerate after a conflict. If the mood at home is changing, a pillow fight can help to change everyone’s thoughts. Important in an upbringing without punishment is the bond between parents and child.

A “free” upbringing requires a good relationship. Playing together, more detailed information about a style of upbringing in which the free development of the child is in the foreground can be found under the article: Anti-authoritarian education. For more detailed information on a style of upbringing that focuses on the free development of the child, see the article Anti-authoritarian Education.

Psychological aspects of punishment in education

There are forms of punishment that can have a negative effect on the child’s development psychologically. “The quiet chair”, “the quiet stairs” or placing the child in a corner with his eyes fixed on it are forms of punishment that are insulting, degrading and humiliating for the child. They are destructive and not constructive.

Similarly, frequent punishments are similar. If a child is punished very often, this is anything but nice for a child. It reduces the self-esteem enormously and leads to the child behaving more passively and losing motivation in many things.

Psychologists recommend logical consequences in education. Depending on the author this is described as punishment or punishment free education. Logical consequences are consequences of the child’s misconduct.

If a child does something wrong and understands the consequences of the mistake, the child learns from it because there is a logical connection with the misconduct. Psychologists advise parents to think carefully about what they want to achieve with punishment. Punishment in education only makes sense if the child learns from it and understands its misconduct. This topic could also be interesting for you: Educational means – Which ones make the most sense? or educational counselling